Life: Struggles and Encouragement

There are so many days that I sit down to write on this blog ... and I simply have no idea what to say.
No words, no thoughts, hardly any ideas rambling through my brain slow enough to be caught and fleshed out.

This past weekend feels like a bit of a blur, to be honest.

I hate admitting this to the world, but I was a bit of an emotional wreck this weekend. I am overwhelmingly thankful for the blessing that my husband is in my life. He's my rock when I forget where to look for God. When it's so dark that I just want to shut my eyes and stop straining them trying to find the Light. He never leaves, and he reminds me that God is the same (to an even greater degree!).

There are so many days that having a disability really stinks ... To be honest, I've considering writing a book titled "Some Days Life Simply Stinks" or some variation thereof. It would be all about how hard life is. How easy it can be to find yourself stuck in a bleak view of the shadows that surround you like a brick wall. How easy it is to forget that the shadows aren't really even there ... and you can walk right through them into the light.

Some people seem to have the notion that becoming a Christian means your life will get easier and happier. It doesn't help that even believers answer each other's "How are you?" questions with big smiles and "I'm good! How are you?" even when it is completely untrue.

That notion is beyond wrong, though. In many ways, choosing to become a Christian means choosing to live a hard life ... possibly even harder than the one you were living before. More trials, more persecution ... more growth. Growing is hard! (ever hear of growing pains?) In the end, though, every form of Christian suffering is completely worth it. Unfortunately, it's easy to lose sight of what's important.

Over the past few months I've been having more pains, more weakness, more struggles ... more exhaustion. Emotional and physical. It really wears on you. There are so many times that I just want to cry out, "Why?!" even though I know I won't get an answer in mere words. Even though I know that there is a reason, and I simply can't see it yet. There is some reason I'm being grown (says the woman who barely reaches 5'0") ... I just need to get through the growing pains.

Sometimes it is nice to be reminded of the promises of God. That they still exist today, and that He still has a plan that surrounds my whole life.

This last weekend a horrible tragedy happened pretty near to my home. Such an unexpected night of horror in the Aurora movie theater. It was even more near to my husband, as one of his childhood friends is recovering in the hospital after a bullet went through her skull. Her name is Petra Anderson, and I would encourage you to read this well-worded blog post from her pastor.

There is nothing more wonderful than knowing that the Creator of all things considers us so well as to orchestrate the tiniest (and largest) details of our lives.

Read, and be encouraged. While times may be hard, God never leaves your side. You might feel too weak to endure your struggles, but always remember His infinite strength ... and how much He has chosen to love you!